School has been stressful, grades are probably not the best. Sometimes I understand why because I'm not grasping it all but other times I get it but when I get to the test my head just spins in circles. Things at home are so stressful, I get so worried but I need to realize that its not in my hands and no matter what God is in control.

I was listening to a song today and these lyrics were comforting...

'cause I cant always see your hand

and I cant always understand

the ways of a God beyond me so far

the ways of my God who holds my heart

the artist was writing about Job and all of his trials. I know that my trials are nothing compared to Job.

" So I will trust in Your words, each step I take renew my faith and I will trust in Your words each step I take reveal your grace to me cause I cant always see your hand cant always understand the ways of my God, the ways of you..."

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart lean not on your own understanding but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will set your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

I saw a bumper sticker today that made me think...

"Im enjoying my day off, compliments of God..."

At first I was like...uhhh why would you get a bumper sticker that says you are enjoying your day off, because days off don't happen very often. Then it hit me, it means giving our problems over to God...letting him take care of everything. If only our racing minds could grasp this, we think we need to pick everything up and take care of it when in all reality if we just hand it over to God...we can be on vacation EVERY day!

Sounds like a plan to me! I do struggle with knowing, how to give things over to God though. You know when you're in a group and you assign someone to do something its visible, you see it happen. Where when you hand something over to God...hes not "there" in a sense you cant see Him taking it. Yet, He promises to take our burdens. In 1 Peter 5:7 it says to "Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you..."

Something to think about...:)

*phone rings*
"Hello" ~Me
"Moment of silence..." ~Natalie
"moment of silence?! for what?" ~Me
"My fish died...." ~Natalie
"aw Im sorry Ru..." ~Me
"Its ok...Im going to get a new one, Chris got a red one and Im going to get a green one and hopefully Becca will get a yellow one" ~Natalie
"Why red, green, and yellow?" ~Me
"cause then its a stop light..." ~Natalie

Well this weekend was long yet it seems like i didn't do a thing. Its just been tiring. Tonight I put my spoon in the trash and my trash in the sink...it even took me a second to realize what I did. I just stared at it. oui vey!

3 more weeks until Thanksgiving break and I simply cannot wait. Its going to be nice to have 10 days off. Im going to catch up on sleep, reading (not for classes of course) and watch some movies. Probably start some Christmas shopping...I can hear the money fly out the window already. Its always so hard to find some thing cool and meaningful yet semi inexpensive.

Cait really needs to go to the gym this weekend because the last few weeks have been lazy for me. Its time to get this extra poundage offffff before its time to eat all the pumpkin pies and other such "Thanksgiving-y" foods.

Something cool that God did this week was show me how He provides. I needed a big box for the project for my middle schoolers...and of course I waited till the last minute to get the box and so when I went I was afraid they wouldn't have what i needed. They didn't have a fridge box like I wanted...but they had a stove box which made it easier for me to carry and gave me a different idea on how to make a T.V. Then I was afraid that I was going to have to spend an arm and a leg for spray paint...nope. Who would have thought that it would cost 97 cents for a can? Not me. Now comes time to get my "Wendy" outfit...GOODWILL had a night gown for $3.50 and I found ribbon at Wal-mart for $1.97. So all in all our Halloween outreach extravaganza cost about $10.00! I can deal with that! Thanks God for providing even the simple silly things!

Well, yesterday I learned how to change my oil. I figured out that it really isnt that hard as long as you have muscles, and that seems to be an area that I lack in. So...as long as I have a man around to help me unscrew everything I think ill be ok. While underneath the car I got really disoriented and thought that my front tire was a spare tire up under the hood. I shouldn't have mentioned my thoughts out loud because it created yet another thing for the family to make fun of me for. haha. Im so glad I learned, I have a sense of accomplishment.

I want to try crossing things off of my "Want to do/ learn" list while im young and single and have the time. I never really had much ambition for all of it until recently. I have really struggled with being single, I pray everyday that God would make me patient, help me to see the things that are right in front of me and to help me know who He has for me. Its still a struggle but I find myself being more patient and enjoying what is in the here and now.

God is just amazing, I have been seeing Him work through me and for me. I have so much due this week (probably shouldnt be blogging...haha) and an event I was to attend just got cancelled. Yay for some extra studying time! Take some time to stop and say Thanks and enjoy this wonderful weather that we have had lately. :)

eh, ill try this out for a little. We'll see how it goes!

So being home with the family is always interesting. Today I set up an email account for Natalie so that she can email me while i'm at school. "G-mail" is the hottest thing in Becca's life and therefore Natalie feels the need to be involved. Natalie got a list of everyones email address and sat at my laptop and sent out her emails. Im sure in her little head she felt so official. She looked so cute doing it, at one point I was observing her and she was acting like she was reading this long extensive email....all along I knew she was pretending. Made me think about when i was younger how I thought moms "junk mail" made me feel like I was so official.

My next funny story is about when Chris Jeff and I were talking about my sign language class, Chris was impressed at what i knew and said "WAIT YOU CAN READ BRAIL NOW TOO" Jeff and I both laughed and reminded him that brail is for blind people.

Life is crazy, you never know whats coming here and sometimes I wanna run away from it all, but its moments like these that remind me how blessed I am and how much i would miss my siblings if I were never to see them again. :)