"TBD" "Too Busy Disorder"

So blogger changed, and it tells you how many profile views you have had.  I have more than I thought I would, unless its my faithful Emma checking up on me. :) Anywho, moving right along...

For the last couple of days I have been thinking about the phrase "Im so busy, I don't/didn't have time..."  Now, for some people and on some days this phrase is 'legit' and true, however if there are any out there like me, somedays its just a conveinant excuse to use.  Not only to someone who wants to spend time with you, but especially when referenced to spending time with God.

This past week I taught a lesson to my group of high school girls about spending time in the word and building a relationship with our creator. I talked about how we are supposed to treat Him like He is a friend not just someone who dictates our life and occasionally sprinkles us with blessings.  I mentioned how we always make time for friends, Facebook, eating, social activities etc... yet at the end of the day when our devotions haven't been done we say "ugh sorry God I was too busy, I didn't have time to get to know you today and Im too tired to do it now."  Now, maybe Im the only one that uses this excuse, and in that case allow me to just talk to myself here.

When you (I) think about it, this really is the worst excuse ever, because if Jesus would have used this excuse when it came time for Him to be crucified, where would we be today?  He made the time to die for the sins He never committed.  So not only did He make time but He sacrificed His time for something He didn't have to do.  When I look at it this way, the guilt for not making at least 10 minutes for him overwhelms me.  The summer relationship that I was in this summer basically ended with "Im too busy, I don't have time for you"  If those words hurt me, Im positive that they hurt the one who created us.  Thank God where sin abounds, Grace super bounds.

Devotions are a drag you say?  Well, I heard once that you should do your devotions at a time that you are fully awake and can focus.  Its also a good idea to associate it with something you like.  So, you like coffee?  Sit down with a cup of java and dive into the word.  Love the outdoors?  Make sure your setting is outside, or close to a window that will allow you to observe the outdoors.  The more comfortable you make it the less of a 'drag' it will be.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself when studying the word.  This list was given to me, so I take no credit.

God, what will this change in my life?
How will it adjust my life?
How will I be different?
If this passage is true, how will is radically change my life?


So, are we really busy or are we out of focus?  Do we need to re-prioritize our daily tasks? Are you going to allow what you know needs to change to just stare at you in the face or are you going to attack it?

 I know what I need to do...I need to get back to my homework so that I can get to my devotions tonight.

:)

We've got some growing up to do...

So this summer I was a fool and fell for the wrong person. I should have known that what was happening was too good to be true. I am trying to look at this experience and learn from it. I mostly look at it and think "You're an idiot."

God has taught me a lot through it all. I learned a lot about myself and that you can't trust everyone you know. I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt which is not always a bad thing. I guess I just need to adjust my filter for it.

He has also held my hand through it all even though most of the time I tried to drop that hand. Remember those times as a child when your parents wanted you to stay with them but you were convinced that you would be ok not holding their hand? You would try to wriggle out of their hand and their grip just got tighter. Sometimes they decided that they would teach you a lesson and let you go, still keeping a close eye on you. You'd walk away in your short stature and turn around with pride to show them "see I can do this all by my...oh wait where did they go?!" They were always there just not in sight of little you, enough to make you turn around and seek them out. I kinda feel like that was how my summer was. I was caught up in pride and kept walking my "I got it all, and my life is in control" walk and then all the sudden I took that glimpse and realized that I had left God on the back burner and wasn't walking in His footsteps.

This lesson hurt, literally I can sit here and think about it and my stomach will get sick but I know that God has a plan and I just need to get my butt on track and listen to His still small voice. Will I fail at following this constantly? Oh yea...this is going to be hard, but I know that this is something that I need to get on track.

I think one of my issues is that I am mad at God. I expected all my life to be married by now or darn close to it and here I am...still single. I know that now days everyone gets married older and there is more maturity when you're older, but when you spend your life expecting something its kind of disappointing when that dream isn't fulfilled. I know that Gods timing is perfect...this is just me complaining about it. I shouldn't be complaining though. He has proved himself to me in so many ways and through so many people. Little blessings or random encouragements just make me look up and say "You know what you're doing help me to follow your lead."

Hows that for a total rabbit trailed post?

“Do not call to mind the former things,
Or ponder things of the past.
Behold, I will do something new,
Now it will spring forth;
Will you not be aware of it?
I will even make a roadway in the wilderness,
Rivers in the desert."
~Isaiah 43:18-19

"Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know." Jeremiah 33:3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mx8ViFhn6Gg

My Darling Cousin...

So I made a whirlwind surprise visit to my darling cousin who is ever so forgiving! :)

stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Life has been so crazy weird and I sometimes just dont know how to handle whats being thrown at me. My spiritual life has been spiraling downward and I know that is a huge reason why my decision making is cloudy. I know that I need to stick closer so that He can guide me.

I have been getting so frustrated with people lately, I just dont get why people dont understand standards and where I come from. Its not that hard. I know that I need to let God use me and that my timing is no way near the timing that He has but im getting so tired of the waiting. Im getting tired of people thinking that im better than them because "i dont ____" well..I mess up too, im not perfect!

Im also getting tired of the punches, the words that hurt. Walking the straight and narrow gets old, and sometimes im not sure what has been keeping me on the right track and from rearing off.

Lord draw me close to you and never let me go, help me to see that you are all I need...

"Jesus said, "If you believe, you ill receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22

Thank you Lord for all your blessings! Help me to be more patient for those you havent answered.

Big girls do cry...

“Dear Lord I thank you for everything Lord, I pray that you would just protect Jeffrey while he is at boot camp this summer. Lord please help him to get through all that he needs to do. Lord I need to know that you are going to be right beside him protecting him and giving him strength, I know its going to be tough. I know I shouldn’t worry because you are going to take care of him and you’re the only one that is going to get him through but im really going to miss him. In your precious name, Amen.”

This is the prayer of my 10 yr old sister. As I was unpacking my disastrous room I heard sobbing coming from my sisters room. I thought maybe there was a stuffed animal lost or something else was bringing on the tears. When I went in to see what was wrong she told me she was listening to a song and thought of Jeff and just started crying. I asked her which song and she took out his old cell phone and started playing one of his old ringtones he had recorded “If you’re reading this” By Tim Mcgraw. If you haven’t heard it…it’s a heart wrenching story about a soldier who didn’t make it back home. I explained to Natalie that, that song was a little different then Jeff’s situation right now. She said she understood but she is still going to miss him. Jeff took her out a few weeks ago, got her McDonalds and took her to a park and let her play. She told me that that memory meant a lot, and to have him gone this summer and not around to play with her in the pool is going to be tough. As I sat there stroking her head and holding her hand I tried to be tough and encourage her to pray for him when she gets upset…I was able to keep the tears back until she prayed the prayer above, there was no stopping the crocodile tears. We love Jeff and it is going to be tough to not have him around this summer. I pray that the Lord sends him a Godly friend, that God carries him when he can’t take another step, and that he stands up for what he knows is right.

I love you Jeff. :’)